Imagine THIS to Effortlessly Improve Your Confidence
Episode #9 of
Easier Movement, Happier Horses
FREE resources:
Would you like to be a more confident, competent horsewoman?
There's a good chance that you do! After all, feeling anxious is one of the most - if not THE most - common equestrian problem that I hear about.
That's why in this episode, you'll learn 5 steps that'll help you become a more confident, skillful equestrian. You'll feel better - and so will your horse.
And it all starts with unlocking the power of your unconscious thoughts.
- Choose What to Focus On
- What you focus on determines your results.
- What do you currently believe about yourself as a horsewoman?
- Will you focus on your anxiety? Or will you focus on what you WANT to experience?
- What kind of horsewoman would you like to be?
- What would you LIKE to believe about yourself?
- Physically FEEL what it’s like to be that horsewoman.
- How does she act? How does she dress? What does she think about before she gets on her horse? What does she think about on her horse?
- How does she describe herself?
- Be mindful of your language in your daily life. After all, you get what you focus on. Your unconscious mind doesn’t process negatives like your conscious mind does. So if you say, “I don’t want to feel anxious,” it focuses on you wanting to feel anxious! This is why people who are focused on “not wanting to be broke,” often continue to struggle.
- Use positive language that your unconscious mind can put to good use.
- Don’t say anything about yourself that you don’t want to be true!
- How does she take care of her body and mind?
- What’s her relationship with her horse like?
- Create a compelling, sensory-rich experience as this “new, ideal you.” Infuse it with feelings, with physical sensations.
- Create a new, empowering story about yourself. What experiences do you have as this “new, ideal you?”
- Experience this improved version of yourself as if you’re seeing a video of yourself, rather than seeing the world through her own eyes.
- Looking at yourself in this way, your new identity will act like a magnet that you’re drawn to. You’ll be inspired and motivated to be this ideal you.
- Change what you believe about yourself.
- Your brain will look for evidence to support your identity. Choose wisely!
- Create a compelling future that motivates and inspires you!
- Change your beliefs about what is possible for you. Find evidence to support these new beliefs. Here’s where the Feldenkrais Method plays a big role.
2. Improve Your Physical Abilities Through Feldenkrais®
- Feldenkrais® can improve your security and balance in the saddle, helping your nervous system feel safe. This can immediately enhance your sense of competency and confidence.
- You’ll be better equipped to deal with sudden, challenging situations, as your body will be more responsive.
- The experience of creating easier, more elegant and athletic movement will give you the ability to infuse your new identity with the sensations of what it feels like to be more competent and confident. This is an essential step. Just thinking that you’re more competent and confident, without the accompanying feeling behind it, won’t get you the results you’d like. You must add feeling, sensations to your thoughts.
- Feldenkrais movement lessons (“exercises”) are designed to help you create a sense of ease, elegance and athleticism. Even if you’re injured, arthritic, etc. you can do the movements slow and small to get the sense of ease and effortlessness. This is very important!
- You want to associate ease and pleasure with movement. Your brain will want to expand on those positive feelings.
- With these physical improvements, you’re also priming your brain to expect improvement to be easy and pleasurable. You’re setting the stage for greater and greater improvements in the functioning of your body and mind. This is evidence that your brain needs to support your new identity.
- By recognizing your improvements, you’re experiencing “wins” that help your body-mind align with your new identity as a more competent, confident rider.
- Celebrate Small Wins
- Did you canter today? Go out on trail? Compete at a local show? By celebrating even small wins, you’re building up a bank of evidence that supports your identity as a skilled horsewoman who’s improving.
- This reinforces your new identity and your brain will pay attention. And then it’ll look for more evidence to support your new identity. You’ll get your brain working FOR you!
- Focus on what’s going well for you.
- Stay Present through Sensory Awareness
- Focusing on physical sensations doesn’t allow room for unhelpful thoughts that can spin you into more anxiety and tension. Release the physical tension, breathe in a relaxed, mindful way. Create a positive, upward spiral!
- Tuning into how you and your horse physically feel can ground you and help you move forward with confidence.
- Again, the Feldenkrais Method helps you develop this sense of awareness, this heightened sense of feel.
- Use a Confidence Anchor
- Neurons that fire together, wire together. When we do two actions together, a strong neural connection is ultimately formed.
- You can take advantage of this by remembering a time when you felt really confident. As you re-experience this positive event, you do something novel (such as a particular fist pump). This "wires" the two events in your neurology and you can bring up the positive, confident state just by doing the novel action (such as the fist pump).
- This is a convenient tool to immediately change your emotional state.
- An anchor helps us get to a desired state quickly.
- For full instructions on how to create your confidence anchor, listen to Episode #5 of Easier Movement, Happier Horses. Or go to https://www.marydebono.com/anchorconfidence to get your FREE PDF cheat sheet.
To summarize: To improve your results, you have to improve your actions. And the way to improve your actions isn’t willpower, but awareness of your habitual thoughts and movements.
And with this awareness comes new, improved strategies for moving and thinking in healthier ways so you can live the life you want. Which means becoming a more competent, confident rider.
I can’t wait for you to go through these 5 Steps to improve your competence and confidence with your horse. I’d love to hear about your experience. Please email me at [email protected] or come join our free FB group, Happy, Healthy Horsewomen.
If you’d like my personalized help, I have a few 1:1 online Zoom sessions available where we can address your movement or mindset issues in an in-depth way that’s tailored to your unique needs. Email me at [email protected] if you'd like to learn more.
Thank you so much for being here. I can’t wait to talk with you again. Bye for now.
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Important safety reminder: Riding and handling horses are potentially dangerous activities. If you feel anxiety or fear, it may be warranted! Please don't do anything that can put you in danger. Educate yourself and seek the guidance of a qualified, positive trainer. The information in this podcast is for general education/entertainment purposes only and is never intended as professional advice.
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Questions? please email [email protected].
xo, Mary
